I Need to Talk to You

Music: Fugue.
From the Quintet in G Minor for violins, viola, cello, and piano.
By Dmitri Shostakovich.
Sequenced by Dmitri Bachovich, at
Kunst der Fuge.

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About This

Poems for

Copyright by
Nicholas Gordon

I need to talk to you, my dear,
Of many, many things:
Of what I wish and what I dream
And what my silence sings;
Of all the things I want for you
And all the things I fear,
And all the things I try to say
But never can make clear.
I wish that you could know me, yet
I'm glad that you do not.
Sometimes I see in you the unformed
Person I forgot.
I wish I could protect you
From all that conquered me,
And make of you a mirror of
The self I could not be.
I need to talk to you, right now!
I've got a lot to say
About the way you handle me
And why I act this way.
I know you love me, though sometimes
Your anger's all I see.
But if I do just what you want,
Then I'll be you, not me.
I need to get you off my back
And also have you near.
I need to learn the limits of
My courage and my fear.
I need to ramble on my own
And sometimes, yes, get lost,
And touch the heart of ecstasy
Regardless of the cost.
I need to talk to all of you,
I am so much alone.
I hope that you can spare for me
Five minutes on the phone.
My life was once so full of life,
So packed with toil and love.
Now it's full of memories
That dance but do not move.
You do not know me really now --
To you I'm mainly old,
Befuddled, frail, incompetent,
A child you have to scold.
But inside I'm still mainly me,
The one who made you, you,
Now a husk without a seed
And little left to do.
I need to talk to you, I need
All of you to know
The me I think of as myself,
The me I rarely show.
By those I love the most, I find
That I'm most often seen
Through acts I would undo and words
I do not really mean.
I need to tell you everything
That bursts within my heart,
Simply, just the way it is,
With neither craft nor art.
I need you all to see me
With love and sympathy,
And so I need to talk to you --
You need to talk to me?

Copyright by Nicholas Gordon. Free for personal or non-commercial use.

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